Maybe

I used to have a band as the background image on my phone. J saw it one day and acted a bit off. He didn't say anything but it was obvious that he was mildly annoyed or something. I just thought he thought he thought it was stupid.
Now as things unfold with J, I wonder if it was something more. Maybe jealousy.

Personal

I can't stop thinking of him. So horny.

Merry Christmas

I wish I could tell D Merry Christmas or let him know I am thinking of him.
Everyone else in my life I can tell, like J.

Start over

Can we start today over, with a different outcome?
I wake up to my mom having a medical emergency and being taken to the hospital. She should be okay, but don't know for sure yet.
Guy I like might be dating someone, signs of it for awhile, shouldn't matter because of my situation, but it still does.
Someone close to me got news of their cancer coming back so more chemo.
And baseball trades.

Another chance

I would love to tell D how stupid I was. I made mistakes and acted so badly. I wish I had treated him, and situations differently.
I would love a second chance now with him. Explain things. See how he feels.

Dreams

Had the strangest dreams last night. Most, if not all had D in them, either a mention or actually him.

Thinking

I can't stop thinking of him.
I would love to contact him, even briefly.